Have you ever?

Have you ever been stressed and not known what you're stressed about? i think that's how i am right now but i can't really tell........... you see my life it's very confusing and very frustrating sometimes and at the same time it doesn't make sense which is why it is probably frustrating..... Well you see School is just a burden to keep kids off the streets and from dealing drugs and stuff even though in most states they still do that sorta thing, then their are guys who just lead you on and act all sweet and kind but then they just randomly stop and you feel like you did something but you don't know what you did....? i feel that way a lot.... actually i have felt this all year... seriously from new years to now and probably for the next little while ... i feel guilty i just don't know what i am supposed to be feeling guilty for? hence the confusion... and the fact that people just don't seem to talk anymore. whats wrong with talking? seriously why don't we do it? all we do is text, email, chat, and face book and occasionally we talk... but what about its like we are hiding behind a shield of a computer screen just so we can hide from the world and share our feelings without really sharing them! why can't we all just be like beauty and the beast and dance and talk and laugh and have snowball fights? and occasionally eat with talking inanimate objects? that would make life a whole lot easier and then we could all just like each other by whats on the inside not our stupid looks!! And then there is the fact that some people just don't think anymore and say stupid things without meaning it.... i was forgiving... i put the past behind me and i gave him a whole new start! thinking everyone deserves a second chance! WRONG!!! when you say to my face that i am a part of your biggest problem! it's kind of hard to ignore! so here's the thing when people say mean things i try not to let it get to me but eventually it does... and when things get to me i get frustrated........ VERY frustrated! and when I'm frustrated all i do is bite my tongue and hold back tears and screams and violence that could randomly swing from my arms and legs and then i just sit there awkwardly and stare this death stare and wonder why people choose to do stupid things like that. why they choose to treat me like I'm not worth anything..... is that what they think? that they are sooooo superior that they can just rule over me and make me feel like dirt and make me feel like I'm not good enough of a person to talk to people or say things or just simply be me? because as far as i know being me is all i can do!! I'm sorry that your expectations in life aren't quite the same as mine and that i DONT think the opposite gender is evil and it is immoral to touch there hand or give them hugs! I'm sorry i don't like science! and I'm sorry i don't like you! You see Christ was the perfect example he said love everyone but you see Loving someone and liking someone are two different concepts.... first of all I love everyone and i don't hate anyone (lets get that straight) you can love without liking them because love is what you feel for everyone its a "i tolerate you" thing liking someone you have to tolerate, agree, have fun with, laugh, talk, and understand... i don't do any of those things with you therefore i don't like you! I'm not trying to be rude or just ongoing about this but when you say something that hurts and you let it simmer for a while things just get out and everything falls apart especially since for the past 18 days my life has been an emotional roller coaster..... trust me you don't want to get on my bad list right now because one move could get you in checkmate....... this is random and pretty much just me getting out my confusions of everything and nothing. the only thing i want to know is..... do people care? do they think before they ...... speak? type? text? leave? (without saying anything) sit across instead of beside you? does anyone even care anymore to even notice? no one notices anymore how people feel or how they respond to things or maybe they do and they just don't want to say anything because slowly we are losing our ability to talk and communicate normally. all you can do is live and let the days pass you even though they seem like a lifetime sometimes ... they will be worth it one day .... and if not that day then the next.....