Disney land

I wrote this poem and it isn't that great but might as well share my feelings to the world since my life hasn't been normal since that day.... that day in disney land when my dreams were supposed to come true but failed epically into a pitof destruction and hatred and tears.... dramatic i know (yes i am a drama queen) at least thats what my sister tells me :) I don't really feelthis way anymore i have kind of just gotten over things and i am just annoyed now not at people just at life in general actually and maybe a feww people but i am trying to be the better person and not think about people badly but sometimes it's hard (fyi when i talk about people it has NOTHING to do with my poem just to make things clear) i just want everyone to move on in life and forget the terrible things we have said or done but it's not that easy and i am having trouble with that myself i talked to my sister about the dramas in my life and she keeps bringing it up and i just don't want to talk about it anymore.... i don't think people understand how i work.... it's easier for me to forget about things then it is to actually face them . i guess that's why i am so quiet (withsome people) but the truth is sometimes i just don't know what to say and so i say nothing at all that happens a lot and sometimes its difficult because i am such a hypocrit about people being non social when i realize that sometimes i am the most non social person i know. i don't like to gossip i truly don't i hate it when i talk about someone to someone else and all i say are terrible things and thats how they think of them from then on.... i don't like it so i have'nt done it lately and i am trying not to but my sister keeps bringing things up and i don't want to talk about them and i don't want anyone to think less of anyone else when i know they are not that type of person all of the time. i just don't want people to think less of one another thats all i ask for is world peace just one simple wish for everyone to stop the fighting, tears, lies, and secrets...... you hear things and you wish they weren't true but sometimes they are. If we were all honest and were open with eachother everything might be ok in this crazy messed up world. but it's not. instead it's a disaster and the more yiou try and fix things the worse they seem to get and they more you think about things the high expectations you have and the higher expectations you have the more you hurt when things don't happen. So please think before you speak, act or gossip. don't lower your standards to their level because i know for a fact..... i am not that type of person .... but sometimes i forget an i am sorry but we all make mistakes move on and don't stay in the past because each day is a gift. and that's why it's called the present. so live it to it's fullest the bet you can. and so now with that long introduction my poem........ Disneyland.

this place is full of dreams
at least thats what i thought
i was hoping for so much more
but all it was - was hot.
you filled me with expectations
with hopes and dreams galore
the things i wished upon the stars
and in your fountains all around
did not come true at all.
in fact they were no where to be found
i was waiting for your colors of all around the world
but when you finally came
i broke down beside teh curb
when water filled my eyes there was nothing i could see
but those stupid colors that kept reminding me.
I was fine and we were walking and you said you were sorry
i lied and said i was fine but i wasn't that next morning.
amd so this ends my story of life in that one day
and all that i can say it that
I truely wasn't ok.....

I am over this now or at least i am trying to forget about it but i am not going to let this control my life because i want to move forward i would rather move forward then stay in my depressing pit of despair alone when it is unnecassary. i know we all have trials and i can't say that i know how you feel but i can say i understand sometimes. more then people know. there are a lot of things people don't know about me and no one knows some things in my life. I have never told a soul about some things. i don't want to but eventually i will. but as for right now i don't want to live in my trials because i have found when you live in them they only get worse and worse till you dig a hole too deep to climb out of. no trial is to small that it doesn't have meaning . every fights there own battle and everyone chooses which side they are on. and when worse comes to worse and the world nocks you onto your knees just know that you are in the perfect position to pray.
Sincerely,
just a girl who wishes that life was as easy as adding 1+1 but knows that the problems just keep getting harder. but i keep getting stronger.